The festive season provides families with the perfect opportunity to get together and especially to check-in on older relatives you may not have seen for a while.

“If you are in your 40s, 50s or 60s and thanks to a rapidly ageing population, you may well have an older relative who is living alone.  Take the opportunity to see them this Christmas, and if you are at all concerned about how they're coping, start the resizing conversation,” says Karl Hallows managing director of Castle View, Windsor.

“We all assume that 'no news is good news' and that everyone is getting on with their lives as usual.  But the Christmas holiday gives us the chance to see just how well mum and dad or that aged aunt and uncle are really getting on as they get older.

“Seeing them in their own home is important.  It is easy for them to disguise what is actually going on if you meet on neutral ground, but observing how they are coping in their own home and normal surroundings will be more insightful,” he adds. 

Here are some 'top tips' on what to look for and help you check on that family member or friend to ensure they are managing and not becoming lonely:

• Diet - are they eating and drinking properly and regularly, and not overdoing the alcohol? A look around their kitchen and a quick peek in the fridge will reveal a lot.
• Fitness - are they stable on their feet, managing to get up and down the stairs and generally moving freely? Are they getting out for fresh air and exercise?  Even a regular walk improves fitness and attitude of mind and increases the opportunity to meet other people.
• Home and environment - the quality of where one lives can have a significant impact on mood, and if their home is starting to look uncared for or showing signs of disrepair and the garden unkempt it might be time to have a word about moving.
• Warmth - is the heating on and are they dressed warmly for winter?
• Mood - are they sounding upbeat and positive or a bit down in the mouth and possibly feeling depressed?
• How is their social life - are they meeting other people, friends and neighbours? Social interaction is important in whatever form but nothing beats personal face-to-face conversation.
• Stimulating activity - are they keeping their brain working? Look for signs of reading, doing puzzles or crosswords to ensure they are not just slouching in front of the telly and giving up.
• Community - are they on friendly terms with their community or are at risk of becoming isolated and lonely?

Beginning to have a conversation with an older relative about any of these topics is not easy, especially the suggestion that now might be the time to move to a more suitable home.  As our elders and particularly if they are our parents, turning the tables on them and giving them advice or suggesting change can be difficult and they might well be resistant.

Start gently and focus on the positives.  Perhaps suggest that if they lived nearer to you, you would be able to see them more often to help out, and hopefully they will find your concern for their wellbeing reassuring.

To ensure they are receptive, the timing for any such discussion is critical, and you need to try and find the right moment, admittedly tricky.  Older people will often put up all sorts of reasons against the idea of downsizing: 'I'm too young/not ready', so you need to have some answers prepared to counter the resistance or else they risk leaving it too late.

Comments Karl Hallows, “We are the first to admit that moving home in later life can be a challenge - there is a lot to think about, but many of those who have successfully made the move will say that the real risk is in putting the decision off.  'Do it while you are still young enough', is the answer.”

Try not to bash your way through all the reasons why a move makes sense, and take it in small steps.  You can always return to it, but just leave them with a few pointers to think about, and by the time you next see them, they might well have come round to your way of thinking, realising that the old house is now too big and costing too much to heat and maintain, and that there might well be a better alternative.

“I moved to Castle View from over 100 miles away,” says homeowner James.  ”This was a new stage of life for me and the friendly community of other homeowners and staff has confirmed that I have found the right place to live.  Castle View meets many of the criteria you can enjoy when on holiday without leaving the luxury of your own home.”

To find out more about how we can help your relative make the move, simply call Nicky King, sales manager at Castle View on Tel: 01753 378127 or arrange to pop in and take a look around.  We are at Helston Lane, Windsor, Berkshire, SL4 5GG www.castleviewwindsor.co.uk

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Note to editors:

Castle View Windsor

Castle View Windsor is a new generation retirement community where the emphasis is on living rather than retirement.  Independently designed, built, owned and operated, this premium village offers 64 contemporary 1, 2 & 3 bedroom apartments, prices from £350,000.

For more information, please contact:

Nicky King, sales manager, Castle View, Helston Lane, Windsor, Berkshire, SL4 5GG

Tel:     01753 378127

          www.castleviewwindsor.co.uk

Jeremy Clarke, LawsonClarke PR

Tel:     07778 554666

clarke@lawsonclarke.co.uk

Ref:    CV14/2024